Memoirs of a Couch Potato

Every season I say I’m not going to watch it anymore. I tell everyone this will be the show that I will avoid like the plague.
The commercials get me.
It’s like looking at a car accident.
I can’t look away.
New York picked Tango.
Tango proposed to her and she said ‘Yes.’ I feel another spin-off in the works.
I don’t know whether to be happy or sad for New York. True, she did get her heart broken twice by Flavor Flav on national television, but she did show her behind (literally) on both shows.
I did not want Chance to win. At first, I liked him because he was one of the few people to stand up to New York’s crazy mama, Sister Patterson. But as the show went on, Chance went from being a straight thug who could handle New York to someone’s drunken uncle at a family reunion. Things came to a head when the men were given the task to baby-sit a group of young girls. Yes, the girls were out of control, but they’re kids who were probably told to act as bad as they could. At the end of the mission, the girls told New York that Chance was a horrible baby sitter. When Sister Patterson told Chance he couldn’t take care of a pig, he went crazy. Claming he was leaving, Chance revealed that he had a son. So if he has a son, who he claims he’s taking care of, why get upset? He knew Sister Patterson hated him, so why feed into it?
I have really developed a love/hate relationship with the characters on the show. I love them for their kooky behavior, yet I can’t understand how they know nothing about anything! I have a family member who is like that, but I just chalk that up to her being stupid-but I expect more from New York.
Who wears fake eyelashes to swim with dolphins?! Fur eye lashes that look like spiders! When New York said she was tired of the “asses,” I was floored. Horses are not referred to as asses, donkeys are. And when Chance found out they were taking a trip to Mexico, he said he’d never been overseas before?
I’m not looking at a map, but I’m willing to bet there is no ocean one has to cross from California to enter Mexico. Hold up and let me Goggle it. It’s facing east, close to the Gulf of Mexico. Woe to the educational system in America.
After yet another fight between Chance and Tango, which New York started, she choose what “her heart needed” instead of “what her heart wanted”. She was looking for love, and that’s exactly what she got. Tango on bended knee.
She fell in love with Flav on the first season, so why can’t Tango have fallen in love with her in that short period of time? By the way, he’s also a rapper-I’ve been on his Myspace page.
Good luck to the both of them. After those weird faces she made at him, Tango is going to need all the prayer in the world.
Flavor Flav spin-off number five, “Charm School”, will be debuting next Sunday at 9 p.m. on VH1. If you miss it, don’t worry, I’ll be watching.